With all the tenacity that could earn them jobs in the UN Peacekeeping Corps, representatives from AC Milan have successfully negotiated with UEFA to ensure that the two game ban on goalkeeper Dida is halved with immediate effect.
Dida, you'll remember, did a fine job of acting out the part of an assassinated bystander when Celtic played AC Milan recently. As the game ended, a Celtic 'fan' ran onto the pitch following what turned out to be a winning goal for The Bhoys and tapped the Brazilian lightly on the side of the face. Dida gave chase before falling to the ground in dramatic fashion whereupon he received 'treatment' and was stretchered off clutching an ice pack.
To my mind, this shows nothing but weak, lily-livered administration on the part of the UEFA officials dealing with the matter. I think they've also missed a trick here. Had I been negotiating with the AC Milan representatives, I'd have said "Sure - we'll cut Dida's ban by half... as long as we can:
a) ...cut Celtic's fine by half"
b) ...cut Dida's match fee by half"
c) ...cut the number of hands Dida's allowed to use in his next game by half"
d) ...cut the number of points AC Milan accumulate in the group by half"
...and so on and so on.
What kind of message does UEFA think this will send out to anyone else who thinks they can bring bad fortune on their opponents by embarking on a career in acting? Dida will now only need to sit out tomorrow night's game against the mighty Shakhtar Donetsk before taking his place back in the side again, so how much of a punishment is that? Nothing short of a ban from the entire competition will do as far as I'm concerned and that's that.
Just keep this little incident in mind the next time you hear about UEFA's Fair Play initiative. If you prevent yourself from laughing openly with derision when you do, congratulations.
Yeah, this is total monkey business. I would have loved to be in that meeting to see what kind of arguments the Milan rep's made (read: to see what kind of sexy Italian prostitutes they brought with them to "convince" the UEFA officials).
ReplyDeleteWhy was he being carried off on a giant heineken can? Was it to prove he's the best actor in the world?!
ReplyDelete"Probably..."
ReplyDelete(Sorry - couldn't resist that little advertising joke there...)
Adam, I was thinking it could have been some sort of monetary inducement, but your version kinda fits better...
He's already half of a keeper, so making him use one arm would be even more disastrous.
ReplyDeleteChris o -
ReplyDeleteBecause when Italians cheat, they cheat with style?
I think its all OK to be honest, and you ladies seem to be missing the bigger picture :- A FOOTBALLER HAS APOLOGISED.
ReplyDeleteYes, an overpaid fool apologises for faining an injury - previously unheard of.
How ironic that its a goalkeeper that apologises for diving.
So were you acting on behalf of AC Milan or UEFA in these negotiations? :)
ReplyDeleteI think Celtic asked for the ban to be cut so he would be eligible to play against them in the return match
ReplyDeleteSo that they can properly injure him then?!?
ReplyDeleteI hope that same fan goes to the San Siro, runs out onto the pitch AGAIN and gives Dida another love tap.
ReplyDelete